Tuesday, August 23, 2005

I Need a Million Hearing Aids, STAT!

While packing up for school today, I had MTV's TRL (Total Request Live) on in the background. I don't really know why. Part laziness--not wanting to change the channel to find something decent to watch--part curiosity as to what's "popular" nowadays, I guess.

After watching their top 20 countdown, I have come to a conclusion. Preteen America is suffering an amazing epidemic of deafness. It is the only logical conclusion as to why they regularly and willingly subject themselves to such suckitude (with a few minor exceptions, but my guess is those are just flukes). It could be a rising increase in masochist tendencies among youth, but that seems doubtful considering the large amounts of gleefull cheering they do for their favorite acts. Deafness is the only explanation.

I wonder what natural phenomenon could have caused such wide spread hearing loss. So strange. Doctors, you best get on this. Hearing aids all around!


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